


Feeling at Fault

by Fastandfierce



Category: Avengers
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Drinking, F/M, Spoilers for Endgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 10:55:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18827227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fastandfierce/pseuds/Fastandfierce
Summary: Avengers Endgame Spoilers!What if they had found Thor before he went into a deep depression? What if they could’ve prevented him from going to far down the rabbit hole?AU from what was shown on screen. Maybe be just a one shot. I dunno.





	Feeling at Fault

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoy the story!

Days had turned into weeks and weeks had turned into months. He wasn’t even sure how long it had been since they had came back from the Garden. He didn’t even know what day or month was either. Everything seemed to turn into a blur to him. The bottom of the beer bottle had become his best friend. Afterall, it was his fault that they had lost. All of it.

He should’ve aimed for the head sooner, not just in the Garden. Maybe then.... things would be different. Just maybe. It was always a constant thought in the back of his mind, when he wasn’t drinking himself into a stupor. Or eating like a pig to not think about anything else.

He had shut out the whole team. They had moved on. Stark was now married, Rogers had become some leader of hope, which was pathetic since half of the population was gone and there was no hope to begin with. He had no clue what Banner was doing, even though from what he had seen on the television he and the Hulk were one. A thing he never thought possible, especially after what had happened before.... he paused in his thoughts, shaking his head. It was from that moment, when his sister Hela had come into play, before her passing, that it had all turned into a big ass mess.

It had been his fault.

The whole thing was.

His hammer was gone, broken to basically nothing. He wasn’t worthy of it, or anything else. The Stormbreaker, that lay against the wall, hadn’t been used since....

“I can’t. It’s my fucking fault!” He roared out loud, picking up the nearest object and throwing it across the room. It broke against the wall. His anxiety getting to him at the same time. “I need... something stronger!” Thor bellowed our to no one in particular, before heading towards the back of his house, and getting the stronger stuff. 

Opening bottle of rum, he downed the contents. Smiling as the contents made its usual burn down his throat. He was already buzzing from the beer, but knew this would up the anty. A knock sounded on the door, though he wasn’t sure if he was imagining it or not, so he chose to ignore it, as he opened another bottle.

“Thor?! What the bloody hell...” came an all to familiar voice. It couldn’t be. 

“No Thor here!” He replied with a child like laugh, as he leaned against the wall. Oh how he felt goooodd!

“What... Thor...”

“Don’t want it. ‘Ou can ‘eave!” He slurred our, trying to walk to the woman. “I’m fine!” Thor told her, as he fell to the ground a second later. Yup, he was definitely drunk.

“Oh Thor.” The sadness was etched all over her voice.

“Nat I don’t need...”

“Come back to the compound. We can help you. It’s not...”

“It IS my fault! LEAVE!” He roared out, his voice not holding the same vibrancy as it once did, but just enough to get its edginess out. Or so to him it seemed like.

“No... no it isn’t Thor. No one blames you!” She said, her voice seemed shaky, almost as if she was crying.

“I ‘on’t ‘eed no... ‘ympathy. ‘OOO!” He yelled out drunkenly.

It was his fault.

He should’ve aimed for the head sooner.

His anxiety was starting to get to him again. He closed his eyes briefly, as memories started to flash before his eyes.

He needed more alcohol.

“You can’t leave, Thor.” She said softly. The same voice she used with Hulk after every mission. He wanted none of it.

“I’m not Banner! Leave Natasha!” He said in a threatening voice. He wanted no part of whatever it was she was trying to do.

“I can’t...”

“YOU WILL! GOOOO!” Thor bellowed out, throwing the half empty bottle of rum on the ground. Glass and contents spewed everywhere. He saw her cringe, but say nothing else.

His head began to swim though, as his anxiety started to over whelm him.

It was his fault. All of it.

Only if he had aimed for the head sooner.

The last thought ran through his head, before he passed out on the ground. Whether it was from him being drunk, or from Natasha using one of her weapons he wasn’t sure.

The darkness engulfed him.


End file.
